The Boombox

Photo by Brett Sayles from Pexels

I turn away from Death

Let them go

Let them go

It hurts me too much to see

They’re better off without me

Let them go

Let them go

I’m better off behind the gates

Of humanity

I’m better off behind the tears

Glorifying what they use to be

So silly, when they have wings now

It’s far beyond my thoughts of beauty.

Lord, let me swallow my hurt

Pain

Loss

It’s beyond my understanding 

Like Your rising light

Drawing everyone to You

To join You in everlasting Life.

Another poem to read: 2020 Boxes

Lifeguard

Photo by Casila - Boat Loading Dock, London

Drowning,

Now that everyone's let go,

Slipped down their fingertips,

No longer grasped by our relationship, 

Sinking. 

Who would come and save me?

I sunk deep in disappointment, 

From every relationship that I tried, 

To build. 

It became ever clear, 

There was no one there, 

Just the beaming sunlight in the sky

Surrounded by the reality of this abyss, 

Filled with sadness,

Tears. 

Then I saw Him, 

He didn't swim out to save me,

Majestically, 

He walked,

Patiently,

With Grace

On water

To save me. 

Thank you, Lord.

Another poem to read: Stronger

The Mask

Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

I don’t mind wearing a mask

During these times,

I’m hiding behind it,

The Expressive

That blinks behind a disguise,

My eyes are very telling.

Another poem to read: Survivor

Superstar

Photo by luizclas from Pexels

Leave!!!

Paused,

Lost in thought,

Not even the Stars in the sky

Leave people in the dark.

They illuminate the sky,

Shining bright in solidarity,

In the darkest of times

They would never abandon me,

To be left with the Moon

Who’s ever-changing,

As I wait in the dark

For the Sun.

Another poem to read: The Muse

Expectations

Photo by Josh Hild from Pexels

I knew the truth would heal me.

My flesh needed to know,

Family secrets,

So I asked you with my tongue, 

Questions you never answered,

Questions that would always,

Silence you with tears.

Scattered like fall leaves,

The life path, under my feet

Lost,

Not knowing,

You were ashamed,

To tell me the truth.

His Vision of Love

Photo by Gelgas Airlangga from Pexels

I needed to change my perception,

To receive the vision of love, God had for me.

The negative thinking,

The grossness of the images,

The mal outcomes I would create, vividly in my mind

With clouded self-esteem, blocking my every dream.

I was so entangled in a web of darkness, 

Creating a disaster before anything ever happened,

I always thought the worst,

First. 

I got curious about His vision,

What was it? 

What was intended for me?

What was His vision, when He created me?

I realized that it was I, that was preventing me from fulfilling my destiny.

I was a bud, unable to bloom because I was more consumed with sight,

Saturated my life with the sight before my eyes,

I was more consumed with sight than faith.

A flower doesn’t bloom in environments, disadvantaged

Unless it’s soiled with the blood of Christ, 

Rooted in His Spirit.

Fashion Queen

Photo by Godisable Jacob from Pexels

She suffered fatigue
Forcing herself to be, a part of
Their world where she didn’t belong,
But it was her only source of income.

Her skin wore her daily stress,
Textured, swollen, and prematurely aged,
Darkness framed her tired eyes,
She had bags for days, and makeup bags
To blur, to blend, to beat her face.

Dehydrated with coffee breath,
Her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth,
While she fake smiled with red chapped lips,
That looked dried out from matte lipstick.

But above all this,
Her hair was whipped,
She was dressed to kill in fashion,
She looked just like one of them,
She walked tall, in Louboutin,
You would have thought she belonged.

Another poem to read: The Gated Garden

I Think, He Loves Me

Photo by freestocks(dot)org from Pexels

Today, 

I can’t let your energy in,

I need to lively up myself

Vibrate higher,

Two can play the game

Of being ignored,

To control.

I know, 

I’m burning your mind

I know, 

You didn’t sleep last night,

I can feel your energy, 

Transmitting,

I can’t break,

You can’t always have things your way,

I need to feel like I matter,

Show me that I matter, 

To you.

Another poem to read: I Love You

2nd Edition

Photo by Daria Shevtsova from Pexels

He is a revision of the man 
She fell in love with, after rehab.

And during romance he was just happy

Feeling unworthy,

Still in shock that she thinks the world of him,

Together, held by good memories,

How wonderful their love felt in the beginning,

He now touches her with more respect,

Feeling undeserving, even to smell her hair.

Another poem to read: Untitled, April 2020

Long Distance Love

Photo by Soumya Ranjan from Pexels

I would migrate,

Flock to your every need,

Take to the sky, 

Like a love bird, 

To be with you, 

I would break the sky,

Catch a flight,

Suspend myself in the air,

Over this vast atmosphere,

Just to embrace you,

You can count on me,

I’ll be there,

Supporting you and your dreams,

My dear.

I know you need me, 
near and there.

Close enough, 
to whisper in your ear,

I love you.

Close enough, 
to have a hand to hold,

the hand of someone you know,
intimately.

Someone who just knows,

the look in your eyes,

the meaning of your silence,

the secrets behind your smile.

To have someone, 
who wants to understand

In this world filled with people, 
who never listen.

For you, I’ll cross the sky,

To be with you, 

Treasure every moment, until I depart,

I’ll make sure that you know, 

I have you in my heart. 

Another poem to read: The Date

Vixen

Photo by Tim Savage from Pexels

My head just pounds watching you

move in ways that attracted me to you,

I’m finally seeing the woman 

that made me notice, a change in you.

Deep down inside, I’m feeling second best,

Yes, she’s definitely the reason you look away

when I’m trying to connect.

I saw the spark when she came around,

The saliva filled in your mouth,

the blood rushed to your face!,

the dancing energy was all around.

I can’t breathe, I’m so jealous

watching Miss Sassy talk with her hands,

with her acrylic fingertips

she looks straight out of Instagram.

London

Photo by Casila - Paddington Station

I left my heart in London
London, on the track 
At Paddington Station
London, on the beat
In the rhythm of my heart
You make my heart sing,
You’re the poetry in my life
The rhythm to my rhyme, 
The smile in my eyes,
The sauce in my life, 
You restored the optimism, I had as a child,
Gave my heart laughter, I haven’t felt in a while,
I’ve never felt this immensely loved,
I’m flooded now,
Love overflows into everything I do,
You make me better, I owe it to you,
This love really feels like home,
I left my heart in London,
I need to visit again.

Another poem to read: Baba

Don't Hang Up

Photo by Suzy Hazelwood from Pexels

How do I right my wrong

to bring you back to me.

How do I erase the tone

in which I spoke,

to tear you apart.

We were at war,

both trying to win.

I wish I lost

just to right some wrong,

just to be able to hold you again.

Please!

Can you please just listen to me.

Just listen, please.

Don’t hang up,

listen, listen, listen.

You win.

I just want you.

Another poem to read: Long Distance Love

2020 Boxes

Photo by Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels

The sound of the saddening sight
of people claiming squares
on sidewalks, while people are hoarding
squares of toilet paper
some, smoking whole boxes of squares
with no cares, of the virus 
carried in the air.

The sound of the hopeless sight
of the homeless
sprawled about, waiting in long lines
to use the restroom, with no rest
not knowing what will transpire from the virus
while closely watching their belongings,
piled in the square that they claimed.

The sound of hope,
banging pots and pans,  
checking census boxes,
unemployment boxes,
where’s my stimulus payment, boxes
tracking home essential boxes,
standing in boxes
outlined for social distancing, 
staring at cell phones,
laptops,
kindles,
tablets,
television,
quarantined. 
Who’s boxed in!
Boxed in!
Who’s boxed in!

Another poem to read: Quarantined

Dissociation

Photo by Blaque X from Pexels

Those aren’t my thoughts,
These aren’t my wants, hopes, wishes,
That’s not me,
Jealousy.
I don’t know this who-ha,
Whose hands are these, shaking
Raged with envy
Surfacing past trauma
Detached from my identity.
Never wanted anyone to see,
This version of me,
I’m horrified by this ugly
This monster,
Frightened by my own emotions.
This is the type of ugly, I don’t identify with
Reel it in,
Throw it in a box
Let it sink
To the bottom of the ocean
Deafening
Drowning in this dark abyss.

Feeling the gritty grit of my reaction,
Of not being able to possess my passion,
I’m suffocated with frustration,
With not being able to obtain the same,
I couldn’t bear to see it, 
Flaunted in front of my face,
Ripped me down to the core,
Ignited a flame.
I have to extinguish it
Before it gets out of control
Destroying the progress that I’ve made,
To have my heart's desire,
Someday.

Another poem to read: London

The Gated Garden

Photo by Athena from Pexels

You wanted into my garden.
Wanted this wild flower.
Be prepared to see 
my imperfections, as I am
pulling up weeds 
planting new seeds, growing
maturing into my purpose 
on Earth.

You wanted in my garden.
To see this wild flower.
Be prepared for the storms,
for when it rains it pours,
things may appear muddy
with puddles of tears
everywhere
when the sun doesn’t shine
on my life.